Sunday, March 13, 2011

March Q&A, part two

How did you meet?

This is cliche, but a mutual friend introduced us.  She had known me for years and had just recently met my Master.  I remember her telling me "You would like him.  He's an asshole.", and I thought... what?  Why?  That's a weird thing to say.  And he WAS (is <_<) an asshole.  We simultaneously hit it off and somewhat disliked one another.  I thought he was a misogynist with a chip on his shoulder and he thought I was a femi-nazi.  But he became my best friend.  We had both "given up" on relationships all together.  We occasionally comforted one another after other feeble attempts at dating.

Why are other people idiots?  What is with these people?  Why does everyone only want BOOTY CALLS?  We were both rather traditional as far as relationships went and neither of us were the type to jump into bed with people at random.  We weren't trusting.  We were cloistered, closed, and frankly... hiding from the hurt other people had the potential to wield.  And it took.. *counts* 5-6 months of being pals before I was informed that I was beautiful and that he loved me.  That's... the short version of how things started.  I will admit to omitting details, but this story is precious to me and I don't want to risk screwing it up.  So you get the short version... I hope no one minds terribly.

Did you know before you got together that you wanted a dynamic like this? Or did it develop after you were a couple?

I think he knew in the back of his mind, somewhere.  I don't think either of us were totally aware of the details of BDSM.  We knew what bondage was and we knew what sadomasochism was, but the details about how these dynamics were "supposed to work" (we were such noobs!  "Supposed to".. ha) were lost on us, as were the various options such as D/s, M/s, O/p.... etc.  He used to always talk about how he would NEVER be in a relationship where he wasn't in charge.  Being equally aggressive, I sort of just humored him and shook my head, knowing that whether he knew it or not, I'd eventually be in control.  With or without his acceptance or even his realization.

Well... that was wrong.  The details are actually fuzzy to me.  We started dating in an October, and eight months later in June, I received my first collar.  It's actually the leather one in my fetlife profile pic.  (Trivia: that collar actually suffered a sad fate during our recent move in November.  It wasn't really anyone's fault... but I'm still really sad that it's gone because it was my first and it meant a lot to me.  I'm a sentimental lass at times.  But, Master is still around. :) So I'm sure I'll get over it)  At the time, it was very standard to give to a new submissive (which is what I identified as initially, I think..): one inch leather, o-ring.

In all honesty, the details of the transformation from vanilla (but we were never REALLY vanilla... we just didn't know what to call it and it wasn't formalized.. but yea.  Neither of us were ever "normal"), to D/s, to Ms/Op are sort of lost on me.  I wish I could remember it more clearly... but I can't.  I wonder why that is?  I just know that once our toes were in the water, it didn't take long for me to end up as his slave.  Master isn't the kind of man who could live only in the bedroom or with limits on his control... he's like ivy - he's got to be everywhere.  That means he's healthy.  Frankly, I wouldn't have it any other way.

I've always been SO GRATEFUL that I didn't have to look for a kinky partner seeking a dynamic.  I didn't know it was what I wanted.  But I got lucky and landed my perfect companion very quickly... and he came equipped with all these awesome ownership features! lol

Who was first interested in the dynamic you have now?

I think I sort of answered this above.  It was a bit of both of us, but it was mostly him.  He lead me down the rabbit hole with a neat little trail of breadcrumbs and treats.

I'm still following him.


(Brought to you again by Little Monkey)
Keep the questions coming if you've got them, dear readers!


  1. "You would like him. He's an asshole."

    Lol! I love it! Thank you, zelda.

  2. No problem at all! Thank YOU for the questions. :)

    And to this day, I still have no idea what exactly my friend meant by that remark... lol